Back to the Future!

People often have mantras that keep them going. Little sayings of advice to sometimes adhere to or a motto that grounds them or gives them focus or peace. "A list of examples?" you ask. Sure: to thine own self be true, be prepared, the price of security is insecurity, no regrets, love more, have the serenity, courage and wisdom, or maybe the lesser known, always forward, never back. 

In The Terminator, Arnold Schwartzeneggar's famous tag line, "I'll be back" is so threatening, but it can also be seen as a promise. Sure we might come back with vengeance, but in life we can also come back for love. 

Doc Brown tells Marty, "We've gotta go back!" Back where?... Back to the future, back in time, back to Colorado, back to the mountains, back to the coast, back to the ocean, back to Florida, back to work... "whoah, whaoh, whaoh, hold on a second. Let's not go back there again." Until we find a better way, no matter the circumstances, we will have to just keep going back. We even go back to our old habits. (One thing about Covid, I finally stopped biting my nails. Occasionally I find that there's a tendency to go back. But, I have protocols in place and I catch myself and shut it down.) Moving on, or is it back to the point being made. Going back to past hurts is not always bad. We can find healing if we look for it. Going back to familiar places is comforting. Going back home at the end of a long day, at the end of a vacation, or a work trip...this can bring a good feeling even just thinking about it. Or maybe going back home meant you were going to get in trouble because you snuck out and were probably going to get caught sneaking back in, either drunk or in love, or maybe both. (Worth it!) 

Going back to a routine. Going back to the dentist, or going back to sleep. As it turns out, going forward is often going back. 

So, here we are resting on a US forest service road, in beautiful Colorado. (Yup. It's good to be back.) There's a river flowing nearby and the otherwise quiet night offers serenity. There were a few humps to get over along the way, (literal and figurative) but here we are, doing it. Being our best selves. Sometimes it's like, maybe we are Dharma bums?

There is something to be said of having a plan. We all make plans. At least I think we do. Our plan for the summer was shattered when this pandemic struck the world. At that time the outline was international travel to Japan, some time spent in Maine and a trip to Hawaii with short weekend adventures and possibly some work sprinkled in. Then things changed and it was back to the comfortable routine. Go to Tennessee, then Florida for some van projects. We were still planning to head to Maine, but that changed as well. A couple of broken window seals and a struggle to install the new window, had me looking at a journey back to Colorado for a shop that could install the window near the vender that sells the seals. I would buy one more seal and they could install it. (3 seals, a window, shipping, and an adventure across time zones later) Is the window worth it? It has only been a few days, but it gets used often. Call that a small victory? Maybe.

Then consider this... it hasn't cost me anything! While we were in Florida considering the trip back to Colorado, a call comes in asking for a driver to move my friends neighbor from Jacksonville to Boulder. The man was looking for someone to drive a uhaul truck with his belongings from point A to point B while paying for hotel rooms and a flight back to point A after the journey. We negotiated a deal that included paying for a trailer to tow my van to Colorado, gas money and a few bucks a day for my time. Worth it!

It was really a win/win on so many levels. Her neighbor had his belongings transported safely by a professional driver for a low cost and we arrived safely in Colorado, a place we wanted to go, and it didn't cost us a dime and we even made a few bucks to cover future travel expenses as well. I was discussing the details of the arrangement with another good friend and he said that traveling across the country for me was like being in the burrito club at the place down the street. After you eat a certain number of burritos, you get the next one free. 

On top of the financial aspect to the journey, Wilson and I were able to meet up with some of our friends along the way. The first night was spent at a random Walmart in Georgia. Then we rolled in 10 hours of driving later at my AT start date buddy's place outside of Memphis. We met up with another good friend of ours and went out for some delicious southern BBQ. We sat around and talked deeply about life, meditation, alcoholism, relationships, laughter and love. One of them had this to say the next day. 

"Hell yeah! It was my pleasure. I had a damn good time with y'all yesterday. We were three travelers/seekers on our own path through our own wilderness and we all made camp for a night in the same clearing. We got to share with one another our own stories, skills, and thoughts and feelings we have acquired so far on our journey. Now we can each put these new ideas in our packs and continue on our own way a little better for the meeting and little more knowledgeable to help ourselves and others! It was a great encounter as always my brothers! Have a fucking blast on your trip!" As you can see, it was great time being back in the company of these men.

The next night we traveled through Missouri to Kansas! (Oh Kansas. You are the gatekeeper. "Are you the keymaster?") Once over the line we made our way to some farmland outside of Topeka where another friend of ours resides. We chatted some, I met his dad Skip, toured his uncle's farm, ventured out to the pig pens, (standing down wind is rough, also, their boar and his sows are huge!) climbed into the cockpit of some gigantic farm equipment, and we also gave them a tour of our rig. 

They were excited to talk about vanlife and the details that make Wilson as great as he is. Then Skip noticed that the 2 trailer tires on the passenger side were warn out pretty badly. After a phone call to the local uhaul we found ourselves downtown waiting for a roadside technician to come and replace them both. We left the truck and trailer in the parking lot and took a ride a few blocks to sit down for a meal. The food was savory, plentiful, and paired well with one of the local brews. Being back in Kansas turned out to be really good on so many levels. It's a very different place to go back to when you know someone that can show you around.

The last leg of the journey took us back to Colorado, back to my friend's house, back to Boulder and back in time. The adventure gods have shined a bright light on us along the way and the attitude that we sow, one of gratitude and flexibility, continues bear good fruit. Some of us struggle with daylight savings time and the changes it brings to our internal clock. The time warp of driver lag is similar and can cause irritability, anxiety and stress that can lead to frustrations and more irritability. 

It can become a viscous cycle if we don't keep it in check. Stay hydrated, eat, and sleep when you are tired. It helps that there isn't much of a schedule to keep out here. The other day, sitting in the back seat, I found myself wondering what time it was and if I should make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or not. Was it too early for lunch? I realized my phone was on the charger in the cockpit and the clock on the radio wasn't correct. I had a tiny moment of frustration then I decided it didn't matter what time it actually was, because it was peanut butter and jelly sandwich time.

A realization that occured to me the other day during one of my meditative sessions is that each breath we take, though they are finite, has the ability to bring us peace if we allow it. We do not know how many breaths we will take in this lifetime. We do not know how many heart beats we will get. We won't know what death is until it comes to take us away. We can spend our breaths worrying, or fighting, hating or hurting. We can spend them together or we can spend them apart. We can spend them happy or sad, angry, tired, and frustrated or we can spend them content and at peace. Each breath. Every. Single. One. Has the ability to bring with it a little bit of peace if we allow it. I will leave you now with the parting words of Vigo the Carpathian, "Death is but a door. Time is but a window. I will be back"

You're Welcome

Interestingly enough, today I found out that someone found Fenn's Gold. That quest has officially ended. For me though, I had already found so much while on that adventure. The biggest takeaways from that search are to live life fully in the present moment and to include other people in your life. I am still working on my meditation practice and enjoy life in the present moment. Yes my mind wanders. Yes my egoic mind still plays games and seeks attention. I am human after all. Mindfulness is also having an awareness of your body as well as your surroundings: soaking up the sun and smelling the roses and hearing the birds or the ocean waves and feeling the wind in your hair as well as breathing and clearing the clutter of our minds. (In the current environment with a deadly virus being potentially on any surface and being carried by anyone that we encounter, it is good to have mindfulness as a tool in your kit and searching for Fenn's treasure really showed me what being present is all about.)

So, after a few weeks in Florida building and repairing our vans, Jeeps and other vehicles, we made some changes to our "outline" of adventure. We had been planning a trip up to Maine followed by a westward swing, but the universe seems to be pulling us in a different direction. Maybe it is better to yield and go with the flow than to fight the current? We just spent a few days surfing and playing in the ocean where we experienced both strong and mild currents. Riding the wave in is always a good feeling even if it takes you under water, it won't keep you down too long. And fighting a strong current will just wear you out.
Instead of hunkering down for a few more days in the humidity of Satan's armpit, waiting for parts to arrive from Colorado, we opted to accept an invitation to the beach which turned into a really incredible adventure!

Planning such a trip as this one, which was rather spur of the moment, was easy. Ask the right questions and the right answers are readily available and easily received. Where? When? How far? What route? Who do I know along the way? Is there enough time?
Made some calls, dotted some i's and crossed a few t's and we were on our way before we knew it.
Being prepared is a big part of being flexible and going with the flow is easier when you have the tools to make the most of what comes your way. When making choices there is an "en-gathering" phase. Generally speaking it's better to make choices with more information than with less and somewhere there is a line that you cross where you have enough. How do you know when you are looking for too much information? If you have confidence in the choice you are making, then there was likely enough, but know that you can always make new decisions to manage your choice along the way.
Case in point. It's15 hours of travel from point A to point B and it requires a ferry ride. I prefer to not drive more that 8 or 10 hours a day though I can put in 12 or more especially when headed through the "middle" of nowhere. (Think places like Arkansas, Missouri, Oklahoma, Kansas, the Dakota's, Iowa, Indiana, Nebraska. Basically flat rows of farmland or pastures with few trees, hills or turns.) It's also easier to drive later into the day when you are driving west into the sunset as the days are longer that way.
The ferry has a schedule and it's better to book a spot on the ferry or you might be left waiting several hours or even till the next day to get on one. My friend informed me to book a ferry in advance, so I did. When I submitted my order for a ferry ticket they said there were only 4 spaces left on the 4:30pm boat, the third and final ride of the day.
Now I could have easily stopped at a rest area or a superstore to get some sleep for the night, but instead reached out to my good friend who now lives conveniently located, you guessed it, 10 hours of driving from point A. It was on the weekend and she wasn't feeling up to doing much but we had a great dinner, a relaxing evening watching some Netflix and a wonderful time catching up. We slept soundly with air conditioning that kept us cool and then sat chatting over coffee until it was time for me to go.

The drive to the ferry was pleasant and there was little by way of traffic to slow us down. The website asked that folks arrive at least a half hour before departure or else they consider you to be late. I had ten minutes to spare according to their guidelines and ended up having a ferry that delayed it's boarding but I didn't mind one bit. Another friend of mine recently said, "Never hurry. Never worry."

Having a van like this always encourages folks to start some delightful conversation. Even on the ferry there were folks stopping by to talk about this "cool old VW" or how they owned a "73 squareback" or how this reminded them of their "old bus that they had years ago." One older gentleman who was called Grampa by a younger woman, brought his sister by for a while. We chatted about the features and she told me she really wanted to buy a van to live in. She assured me "I could do it." Anyone can really. They just have to be willing to adjust and make the necessary changes. Sometimes though the struggle is real!

So, after arriving at the island, where my friends were waiting in the parking lot to greet me, we drove a few blocks to a restaurant to have some dinner. (All the food for the entire weekend was incredibly delicious.)

After dinner we took the dogs to the beach and we walked along the edge of where the ocean meets the land. The sand, stone and shells gently tapped and danced on our feet and our ankles as we stood there: the rhythmic swooshing and crashing of the waves soothing our tired bodies and minds.

The crabs were also out dancing and darting from one place to another. The dogs chased after them playfully and we ended up catching a few them. One was able to grab on and "bite" the tip of my finger before I let him go. Ouch! It was also really fun to see all the animals eyes reflecting in light of our headlamps. It was as if all the crabs on the beach were coming out to say "You're welcome. Thanks for stopping by."

On the walk back my friend, she's adorable, she really is, "This place is so incredible and you are going to absolutely love it, but you have to put up with the bugs in order to enjoy the rest of what the island has to offer." Now I was just in Florida where the mosquitoes come out in swarms during the evening hours. They mostly fly around near the ground and make a meal out of your legs and ankles. They are kind of small and have these little black and white striped legs, but their most memorable quality is that they are a real pain in the ass for a few hours every night.

The mosquitoes on the island are a very different breed. They are slightly larger and they are all black. When we got back to the campground, I kind of sat there on the picnic table expecting to just sit around chatting over a beer, but that's not how the mosquitoes want it to be. They drove us into our respective vehicles. We bid each other good night knowing that a long restful night's sleep would energize us for the full day of fun and adventure the next day.

The mosquitoes had other plans. They were not like the crabs. They had a very different tune to sing. It was more like reading the map from the Goonies...

"Ye intruders beware! Crushing death and grief, soaked with blood of the trespassing thief."